Esencia

What if you’re not behind in love?What if Saturn is simply preparing you for the kind of union that's a match to your depth?
In this deeply personal and illuminating transmission, Catrina shares the long arc of her 19-year Saturn Mahadasha — a sacred timeline of karmic relationships, feminine refinement, heartbreak, discipline, and devotion. Through the lens of Jyotish (Vedic astrology), she unpacks how Saturn initiates us into emotional maturity, spiritual leadership, and sovereign self-love.
If you’ve ever felt like your path is slower, heavier, or more serious than others… this episode is for you.  It's a sweet reminder that Saturn's delays bear inevitable fruit, not the least of which is the most exquisite expansion you'll ever taste. And for feminine leaders, the love of your life often arrives only once you’ve become the woman who is fully a match to it.
🔥 Inside, we explore:
The soul’s karmic blueprint through Saturn Mahadasha & Sade Sati
The difference between Western & Vedic astrology (and why it matters)
What Catrina looks for in Jyotish compatibility when dating intentionally
The evolution from karmic entanglement to sovereign love
Saturn in synastry, the D9 chart, and dharmic partnership
Why Saturn teaches us to play the long game — in love, in legacy, and in becoming unshakable
This is for the woman walking the path of devotion, discipline, and divine timing.The woman who leads with love — even when it costs her everything.The woman who’s done waiting… and is now becoming.

In this episode, I share a raw transmission recorded during 2023's Saturn Retrograde. I was in the 2nd phase of my Sade Sati (Saturn's transit through the house before, of and after the moon) and the 17th year (of 19 years) of my Saturn Mahadasha. This is from the lens of Jyotish / Vedic Astrology. My natal Saturn is retrograde in Scorpio (indicating a more intense and interiorized activation of Saturn's themes), and this entire Saturn era has been a time of deep karmic reckoning, grief, and rebirth. I open up about breaking patterns, letting go of insidious coping mechanisms, reclaiming self-leadership, and the power of nervous system regulation in feminine evolution.
 
This is for the woman ready to meet her shadows, rise through devotion, and lead from embodied truth. Look out for upcoming episodes where I revisit Saturn's themes with more embodied integration. Timestamps 00:00 – Opening Transmission Claiming full-spectrum feminine leadership, orgasmic aliveness, and unapologetic self-expression. 01:52 – Context Behind the Recording Living off-grid, in Saturn Mahadasha + Sade Sati, and why this episode almost wasn’t published. 03:05 – Saturn's Leadership Initiation The cost of doing it alone, the need for sisterhood, and Saturn's invitation into embodied leadership. 08:42 – Birth of the Mastermind Why this journey inspired a 12-month container for self-leadership and feminine power. 09:52 – The Orgasmic Rocket Ship & Nervous System Mastery Blending sensual aliveness with structured expansion—leadership without burnout. 11:00 – Saturn Retrograde in Scorpio (Main Teaching) How karmic reckoning, discipline, and shadow work unlock deep transformation. 30:00 – Personal Story: Injury, Grief & Self-Parenting Breaking the body to break the pattern. The death of old coping strategies. Rising from the ashes. 57:00 – Inner Child, Forgiveness & Ancestral Compassion Meeting shame, holding love, and reclaiming power.

What does it mean to truly hold the expansion?  When life shapeshifts, identities fall away, and your next level calls you forward?
In this powerful episode, I sit down with Jakob Gricar.  Trauma-informed coach, retreat leader, and masculine mirror for a raw, resonant conversation on nervous system alchemy, masculine integrity, identity death, and leading through chaos.
We explore:• What women really crave in masculine presence• How to stay anchored when life pulls you into the unknown• Shame, co-regulation, and healing in community• Rewriting your relationship with wealth, purpose, and power• The inner game of character development and why it matters more than results
This episode is for the woman who’s expanding fast and craving sacred structure to hold her rise. For the leader ready to stop performing and start anchoring in truth. For the one who knows her next evolution requires deep surrender and embodied masculine support.
Let’s drop in.____Jakob Gricar is a trauma-informed transformational coach who blends a decade of mastery in somatic work, internal family systems, ontological coaching, NLP, and CBT and other modalities to catalyze profound inner change. From high-impact entrepreneurs to people stepping into their purpose, he guides clients to regulate their nervous systems, dismantle limiting identities, and remember the truth beneath the noise.His journey began at 13, when recovering from a chronic illness ignited a lifelong devotion to spiritual practice. That spark carried him from homelessness to near-death initiations, yogic studies in India, deep plant-medicine studies in the Amazon, and the creation of retreat centers in Guatemala and Mexico. Today, Jakob works with world-renowned coaches, mentors other business leaders, leads Vortex Retreats and runs a multi-six-figure online program.______Website: https://jakobgricar.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jakobgricar/Private Podcast: app.helloaudio.fm/feed/0e67bdac-f779-4b45-9495-ddf6fe234d83/signup

Welcome to Season 2 of Come With Me — a podcast devoted to the portals that initiate us into deeper love, wilder truth, and unapologetic embodiment.
In this opening episode, I share a deeply personal story of rupture with the woman who raised me — my Samoan grandmother — and the emotional reckoning that followed when repair wasn’t possible. This isn’t just a story about family; it’s a reflection on what happens when love remains… but safety, attunement, and accountability do not.
We explore:
The truth about repair (and why it’s rarely mutual)
How ancestral trauma shapes our nervous systems and intimacy patterns
The emotional progression from resentment to contempt
What it means to return to yourself when others can’t meet you
The difference between performative and embodied repair
And the radical self-leadership required to break generational cycles
This episode is for those who’ve over-given, over-explained, and still felt unseen. For those navigating the grief of love without safety. For those ready to stop waiting for someone else to change… and start choosing themselves.
You heal forward by healing back.And that healing begins in your body.
Let’s stay connected:Instagram: @catrinaarmendarizWebsite: www.catrinaarmendariz.com🎧 Subscribe + leave a review to spread the love